we were so little when we met. i had no idea at the time that you would have such an impact on my life, or that you would become such an important person to me later in life. i wish i had known time was limited. i wish i had known then that every breath… Continue reading for liam
It's been eight years since I've been able to hear your voice, see that incredible smile, and look into your eyes. As I type that, it seems insane. It feels like a lifetime. I used to come to you for almost everything. You or Chels. Now you're both gone and I'm here without you. Now… Continue reading eight years
grief is hard.
Sometimes I feel genuinely angry that I have experienced such profound loss at such a young age. It isn't fair, I tell myself. There is no God, I decide. I don't believe that I am stuck in the anger stage of grief. I think anger is just where I have landed permanently. I often think… Continue reading grief is hard.
time doesn’t heal
I had a bit of a rough day a few days ago. I briefly visited the TU campus, and it was the first time I've really been on the actual campus since the candlelight vigil the school had for T. I honestly didn't even think twice about it at first. But as we drove through… Continue reading time doesn’t heal
another day, another stay
so i finally moved out. on tuesday june 12th i moved out of my beautiful home that we built together. it broke my heart all over again. i'm temporarily staying with family until i can find a new place to live and until then i'll be hopping around between my immediate family members homes. after… Continue reading another day, another stay
so i've been thinking about what happens now. i thought that my life was already all planned out, i thought i was going to marry the man that has just turned my life upside down, i thought a lot of things. but now all of those things that i thought to be true are not.… Continue reading starting over
Living with a broken heart
i dont even know if thats an appropriate title. I certainly dont feel like im living. My entire world has been ripped from beneath my feet and the person that loved me most in this world did the ripping. I get up and get dressed and go to work but im not myself. Im some… Continue reading Living with a broken heart
I feel like I'm drowning. The slowest drowning ever. I'm alone. I'm terrified, and I'm heartbroken. This is unknown territory. I have been with the other half of my heart for literally my entire adult life. And just like that I'm alone. Sometimes I feel numb, sometimes it physically hurts. I've never been here before.… Continue reading Drowning