remember how i said i’m hella clumsy?

So yesterday, I finally finished all of my christmas wrapping. Thank goodness! So I pile all the gifts around and under the tree and admire how pretty it looks. As you can see in the photo, our christmas tree sits in front of our large front living room window. When it gets dark the lights on the outside of the house shine in so I like to close the drapes at night. This particular time, due to all of the gifts finally being around the tree, I had to reach across and up to pull the drape closed. And then it happened. Wearing socks on a hardwood floor, I slipped, and my entire body fell into the christmas tree and on top of approximately 25 beautifully wrapped gifts. Apparently during the descent to the floor I also managed to kick over most of the photo frames on my ladder shelf and end table as well. Oh, and the scentsy warmer. Wax EVERYWHERE. So I’m home alone, and I’m just laying there not certain of what I should do, when I notice the severe pain in several different areas of my body. I then realize that the only thing that likely kept me from smashing through the window was the fact that when I fell, somehow my arm hooked on the drape pull back (those hooks to keep your drapes open that are anchored into the side of the window frame). So here I am, smashed into a pile at least $400 worth of gifts for family and friends, trying to figure out how in the hell I am going to get up without making it worse. Well folks, i dont know how, but i did. Also-did I mention that I wasnt wearing pants? I had just thrown them into the washing machine and was headed upstairs for a shower when I ran over to close the drapes. So now I have a thousand scratches on my legs from all the gift boxes and broken gifts and tree branches. The drape pull back is bent almost completely the wrong way, I have to assess the damage to the gifts that fell victim to my clumsiness and then rewrap them, my arm has several deep cuts and my body is covered in bruises and feels like I’ve been in a car accident. Lets add this to the fact that last month I fell down two flights of stairs for no reason totally sober. So yes, I AM A MESS. But at least it makes for some quality entertainment.

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